The trip starts at The Hollybush, 29 Bath Road, Bridgeyate, Bristol BS30 5JP, just south of the M4 at Junction 18, where the three of you form up.

West and across the Severn on the M48, the old bridge — quieter and a far better crossing on a bike. Off at Chepstow and up the B4293 over the ridge through Devauden and Trellech towards Monmouth, rather than the A466 along the valley floor: quicker, emptier and better riding. Then west towards Usk and down to Goytre.

Lunch at Baffle Haus, The Cedars, Goytre, Pontypool NP4 0AD — biker cafe, open Friday 09:00–16:00, food stops at 15:00.

North out of Abergavenny on the Llanthony road into the Vale of Ewyas — single track, high hedges, the priory ruins on your left — climbing to the Gospel Pass at 1,801 feet, with the whole Wye valley opening out beyond the summit. Down into Hay-on-Wye, then south-west to Peterstone.

Fuel. Fill at Abergavenny before you turn north. Nothing in the Vale of Ewyas, nothing on the pass, nothing until Hay.

Dinner tonight. HILLS in Brecon — book through their website (bookings don’t exist until the confirmation email lands). Peterstone is four miles out at Llanhamlach, so it’s a short ride or a taxi — if anyone’s drinking, book the return taxi too. Tell Peterstone the group is eating out so they don’t hold a table.

West on the A40 through Llandovery and Llangadog, then onto the A4069 over the Black Mountain Pass — the most photographed road in Wales and the best stretch of tarmac in the south. Back north through Llandovery and across to Builth Wells, then up the A470 to Rhayader.

Coffee and lunch at The Lost ARC, Old Drill Hall, Bridge Street, Rhayader LD6 5AG — about 85 miles in.

Llangurig, then the long empty run north on the A470 to Betws-y-Coed. From there the route turns back south over the Crimea Pass (1,263 ft) down into Blaenau Ffestiniog, then climbs back over it a second time to Betws and runs down the Conwy valley to Deganwy.

This is deliberate, not a sat-nav error. The route crosses the Crimea Pass three times and doubles back between Betws and Blaenau. It adds 22 miles and about 40 minutes over going straight through — if anyone questions it on the day, that’s why.

Fuel. Rhayader, then Dolgellau.

North to Builth Wells, then west on the A483 to Llanwrtyd Wells and out along the Abergwesyn road into the Devil’s Staircase — fourteen miles of single track, 25% gradients and hairpins over the empty middle of Wales, dropping into Tregaron.

Lunch at Y Talbot, Tregaron SY25 6JL — a proper old drovers’ inn, straight off the pass. Early at 55 miles, but it’s the only thing out there.

East to Llangurig, then the A470 through Cross Foxes, Blaenau Ffestiniog, over the Crimea Pass and down through Betws-y-Coed to the coast.

Fuel — critical. Llanwrtyd Wells is the last fuel before the Staircase, and Tregaron is small and may be shut on a Saturday afternoon. Fill at Llanwrtyd whatever the gauge says. Then Llanidloes or Dolgellau.

West along the coast past Bangor, then south through Llanrug to Llanberis and up the A4086 through the Llanberis Pass over Pen-y-Pass beneath Snowdon — climbing out of Llanberis, which is the right way round. Down the A498 past Llyn Gwynant to Beddgelert, on to Maentwrog, north to Blaenau Ffestiniog and back over the Crimea Pass through Dolwyddelan into Betws-y-Coed.

Lunch at Betws-y-Coed — plenty of choice and easy on a Sunday.

East on the A5, then north across the Denbigh Moors to Llyn Brenig — the B4501 and A543 up here are the roads the magazines use for testing, and better still on two wheels. South to finish over the Horseshoe Pass, down into Llangollen and a short hop to Lion Quays.

Fuel. Betws-y-Coed. Nothing at all on the Denbigh Moors.

Stops. Llyn Brenig visitor centre has a cafe — assume it shuts around 16:00 in October. The Ponderosa at the top of the Horseshoe is the traditional last brew of a North Wales ride and heaves with bikes on a Sunday.

Dinner tonight. Eat in at Lion Quays. Sunday evening in rural Shropshire is when village kitchens close early or don’t open at all. The Hand at Llanarmon DC is excellent for an occasion — twenty minutes, booked, taxis both ways.

South past Shrewsbury on the bypass, then the A49 through Church Stretton and Craven Arms to Ludlow — fifty miles of fast, flowing A-road through the Shropshire hills, and the best riding of the day.

Coffee at Ludlow Farmshop (the old Ludlow Food Centre), Bromfield SY8 2JR, right on the A49 and open Mondays, when much of Ludlow town is not. Then east to the M5 and south.

Lunch at Gloucester Services, M5 southbound (GL2 8AA) — the grass-roofed farm-shop services, and genuinely good. 113 miles in, so about half past twelve.

M5, then the A417 or A419 across to the A34 and home.